WHY DOES IT HAVE TO TAKE A TRAGEDY OR A NEAR TRAGEDY FOR US TO BE GRATEFUL?

I have been kissing and hugging my mother all day, grateful for her presence on this planet, reminding myself over and over how different the day could have turned out. Why can't we always live with these reminders? Why do we always live in retrospect? When we live in the moment, with awareness, there is no regret, no guilt, not even tragedy.